The movie I rented yesterday is titled "The Good Father". Again, a long movie taking almost a complete day to watch.

Its main thema is the struggle between a good father and a no-good son. The father (Don) is doing his utmost to get the boy (Michael) motivated and decent but without any significant success. The boy is living his own life, doing what he thinks best: smoking, blowing, spending money, shooting folks and pleasing the ladies.

As the movie goes on, you see the father getting older and fatter. I have read somewhere that this has really happened with the actor playing this role (Marvin Brandon). Amazing.

However, the movie has a very unpleasant ending. The father chokes in an apple and dies; the son visits the Pope and falls from a staircase: also dead. Many other family members and house friends are getting killed because of mysterious reasons: all dead.

Very depressing, very sad.

My advice: ignore this film unless you like to torture yourself.

Finally, some hopeful news about my missing brother William. The police found some objects in the mountains which could be related to my brother William, who disappeared on his mountain bike two days ago.

I have done the best I could at the police station. The police assured me that William's case is in good hands with CSI inspectors Gil Grissom and "H" (I do not trust the second one; who wants to be called "H" ? What kind of parents call their child "H"; "H, come home!", "H, go to sleep!", "H, put down that knife!"). Probably Dutch (Henk?).

Well, the good news is that William seems to be alive; thank God! Tourists found his false teeth, some energy food and some objects I cannot explain.

I told the good news to my brothers Jack (sleeping) and Averell (preparing a barbeque) but they were not impressed. I feel a little bit relieved but still very tense. Later today I will go to the village center and rent another movie, otherwise I will become completely mad.

Joey.

Because there is still no news about William (...Ahhhhh...!!...) I decided to get some distraction and rented a movie, titled: "Lord of the Rings" (three DVD's or eighty-two CD's).

I really, really enjoyed this movie although it is a very longggggg... one (taking three days to watch). I probably fell asleep several times but that doesn't matter; the story line is clear to me.

Here it is: First, the title of the movie is wrong, it should be "Lord, where is my ring?" (Probably translated by a very cheap Translation Company, what a pitty).

The main object of this movie is a Wedding Ring that gets lost and the Bride and Broom try to find it in time (otherwise the Priest will go home and the wedding is OFF). The happy couple is really having very bad luck because all kind of suspicious folks find this ring and do not want to get rid of it. Fortunately, they get help from a bunch of retarded, but friendly teenagers, with strange ears and big, hairy feet. These guys represent the comic note in this romantic holidays movie.

The kids find the ring, after have conquered many, many, many, many, many obstacles and (I do not understand this ...) they destroy it by throwing it into a bubbling volcano (a masterpiece of Lucas@Arts). This is the mystic note in this movie. Strangely enough, the Bride and Broom are still very happy and get married without a wedding ring. The Priest does not care and flies away on his groom after the Ceremony (I think ...).

At the end, everything is OK, all bad guys are dead and the second Finder of the Ring (the first one was killed too, poor fellow) is rewarded with an one-way cruise trip to Hawaii; the boat looks like a pirate ship but the winner is radiating of joy.

The kids weep because THEY did find the ring after all and get NOTHING. This is also the lesson of the movie: (1) Always Go To a Trustworthy Travel Agency and (2) Take Life As It Is.

This movie is a real recommendation and my number one favorite so far.

Joey, Ring Finder.

No news about brother William. We called the police but they seem not to be very concerned. Twice a day a police man takes his binoculars, looks at the horizon and, after less then ten seconds, makes a note: "no trace of William Dalton". Thank you, Kansas Police, Guardians of the People.

My brothers Averell and Jack stay with me since William left us with his mountain bike. I am extremely tense, super-tense; I have the feeling I can explode any moment. Jack is sleeping the whole day (idiot!). Averell is only eating, eating, eating!!!. Please, help me, what do you think, I secretly made a list of things Averell is eating EVERY DAY. What do you think: IS THIS NORMAL??? (see the photo gallery of my brother Averell)

I need your support and solace, help me, I feel terrible! William, WHERE ARE YOU???

Joey (almost mad of grief).

I love all three of my brothers, you know that.

However, I am furious about my brother William, the sports lover, remember? Yesterday, he bought a ... mountain bike and some silly protection for his head and knees and he is exercising right now in the mountains in the neighborhood. I am speechless.

I cannot express my feelings because I am completely over the edge. Imagine: WILLIAM=86 YEARS OLD!!! Do you know how dangerous our mountains are, just for well-trained, professional mountain climbers?? What do you think will happen with an old, retarded man with a bike and a helmet??? If he returns in good order (that would be a real miracle, oh, thank you God !), I will personally break all his bones and knock out his spare teeth.

Sorry, for being so negative today, but I am completely out-of-my-mind. Leave me alone, go home, play with your dog or do something useful but LEAVE ME ALONE.

William, IDIOT !!! COME HOME !!!

Joey (desperate).

Dear, dear Lady Friends. Beautiful, Lovely Queens and Princesses, Bringers of Life, some of you told me that you don't like when I talk about hunting and shooting ducks and rabbits and other animals. You are right, I feel very, very quilty about that, really (many, many times in the past people tried to shoot me, those are the real b*st*rds, why don't you go after them?) .

I am not a cruel man. If a rabbit, bird or deer enters my territory I have to defend myself. Its me or them, please, let's be fair.

To show you that I am not the Neanderthaler you accuse me to be, I will open the softer, human, more femine site of myself for you; I am also Joey the Animal Lover, the Defender of Life, the Mentor and Life Coach and Keeper of Innocence.

In my Photo Album "Nice Petties" you will find pictures of my favourite pets. Kisses from Joey, love you all with all my heart.

I am still isolated from human civilization. Thank God, I have enough beer, beans and ammunition. 
Time to open old boxes with stuff I mostly forgot. I found an old picture of me and one of my first girl friends, Emmy-Lou, sitting in dad's car. My father run a transport business with his brother (Joe ...). I vaguely remember Emmy-Lou, she used to cry a lot and did not like chasing ducks and rabbits. Our relation broke up within one summer holidays.

To give you an impression about Kansas, I uploaded some pictures from the region where I was born, raised and still are living. My birth village is called Eureka (I challenge you to find it on the map below). This settlement is so small and so hard to find that people living there always shout "Eureka", when they come home at the end of the day after work. I am kidding of course (because nobody has a decent job in Eureka). Everyone knows everyone in Eureka but still I feel lonely. My three brothers visit me almost every other day but I seem to speak a different language. Averell is only interested in food, William in sports and Jack falls asleep as soon as he sits down. Most of the time I have good times with my brothers girls friends. Women are just more fun than men, they smell better, are smarter, and really attractive. I dream about having a harem and envy my friend Oil Baba. Wish you all a happy weekend.

Picture: try to find Eureka, my birth place.

Yesterday evening I was sitting on my porch, drinking a cold glass of beer and playing my guitar. My radio was on and I vaguely remember the newsreader saying: "Winter is coming soon". I loudly laughed and took another beer and wished the man good health and many cold nights.

But winter did came soon.

This morning I woke up, opened the curtains and saw NOTHING, pitch-black. I checked the clock (11:20 AM) and looked outside again: ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. Slowly I realized that my house was completely covered in snow. Could winter have come sooner than this??

The rest of the day I felt miserable, lonely and cold. I made a snowman for doggie and shot some birds flying over my ranch but that did not make me feel better.

Thank God, I am on the internet and have so many heart warming friends. I read a new, lovely message from my precious girlfriend Chiara and tried to imagine her in that warm, snowless Italy, drinking wine and eating pizza and pasta (my favourite food). Since then I feel much better, and pretend to be Robert de Niro in Rome, working as a poor taxi driver.

I have uploaded some pictures I made around my house and from the news.

Several friends in Holland (The Netherlands) contacted me by mail and e-mail and told me that I made a terrible mistake a couple of days ago. The fellow that sneeked around my house was NOT the prime minister of Holland but some hot shot from Kazi-Ach-Stan (forgot the exact name). Sorry, Your Higness Jean-Pierre-Ballenknelden, no offense please.

As a tribute to Holland I have added the pictures of the three most beloved Dutch princesses: Princess Jordan, Princess Renee and Princess Geraldine. They are really charming and I sincerely hope for the three of them that they all will find a beautifull prince (in time). I wish them all the luck of the world and hope God will bless them.

Remember: the name of the Dutch Prime Minister is Jean-Pierre Ballenknelden (probably, his family is from France). To the right I added some pictures of the man. Please study them carefully and remember them well. This is an important fellow, constantly fighting the water and keeping thousands of wind-mills in good order. His shoes are wooden but his will is of steel. His hobbies are hunting and safaries (a man to my heart) and he collects stamps and rare glasses.

(I copied all this information from the Dutch Wikipedia).

Pictures: The lovely Princesses Jordan, Renee and Geraldine.

Dear Friends,

Thank you all for the many e-mails you sent me. They are really hart warming and very intimate. Although I am a man of 80+ years, I am still young of heart and still feel like a young god being 50 years old. My special warm interests go to the ladies reacting on my stories and life lessons. I carefully studied the problems you explained to me and without revealing your identity I would like you to give the following advices via this blog:

Fan1: Leave that bastard at once. If you have a gun: shoot him and throw him from the balcony. I will pick you up at 19:00 hours tomorrow at your place; I have reserved a nice place at Pablo Picasso Fantasy Pasta. Really looking forward meeting you.

Fan2: Forget that idiot; he will never come back to you and if he does: kick him out at once. I will pick you up at 19:00 hours the day after tomorrow; I have reserved a nice place at Pablo Picasso Fantasy Pasta. Really looking forward meeting you.

Fan3: My brother William will contact you by phone to make an appointment; please be gentle with him, he just recovered from a double hip fracture and his left ear is deaf.

Fan4: Try to use less make up and wash your hair more often. You are a charming, nice girl but a little bit stiff. Keep practising smiling in front of a mirror. Try to open your eyes when you look at a man.

PS: I still got no useful clues about my stalker. If you know this fellow, please give me some hints.

Welcome, friend, at Joey's Cosy Corner. In fact this site was an idea of one of my brothers but he is temporarily engaged with other issues. He will be back soon, I hope (I am working hard to accomplish this).

Who am I? Joey Dalton, have three brothers and some far away nephews (black sheep, forgot their names). My brothers and I are in banking business since many years but we were not very lucky.

What will be on this site? Deep thoughts, words of wisdom to give you some hope in these difficult times. The Dalton family is highly respected in large parts of the U.S. Many times, Ophrah Winfrey invited us in her shows but we refused (the compensation she offered was absolutely ridiculous).

I have to feed our dog now, so please come back soon and realize tremendous personal growth by studying our advice and food for thought.