Ohh, it was such a peaceful morning, that August morning. Birds singing in the trees, no signs could have predict the cruel things that awaited me ...

It started so innocently ... I went to the kitchen to prepare breakfast for my beloved wife and myself. I remember that I whistled an old song of Tom Cat ("the Java Boy") when I opened the fridge ... no bread ...

I wrote a note for my wife, who was still sleeping, and drove to the city. I hardly noticed that the sky was turning black at the horizon; the demon was awake and smiled his ugly smile at me. Without any sound, the sky opened and God took a Bath. All His Angels and Their Relatives too I think because it kept raining, raining like I have never seen before. Within ten, twenty minutes, all traffic had come to a full stop.

I must have been waiting for hours, days, I don't know, I completely lost grip on time. I had to keep my motor running because I needed the heater (my feet and nose were frozen). During these gruesome hours I only could stare at my fuel gauge. The little needle provokingly ... slowly entered the red area and an ugly red led started to blink ...

At the thresshold of becoming mad, my heart cried of joy when suddenly the sun came through and the traffic started to move again. Praise the Lord. I needed petrol ... NOW. So thought my fellow traffic companions ...

I cannot describe the terrible days, yes DAYS, that passed on my way to the gas station. The roads were so crowded that I could not even open my car doors to run away. The last twelve miles I had to push my car because its engine had died. Inch ... after inch.

After filling up my tank and having cried in the men's room for over one hour, I continued my quest to the bakery. I still don't know why I had to be in that cursed town that cursed moment. It was the most crowded period in Kansas history; I have been filmed by many local TV stations while I was banging my head to the steer, spitting foam, I am afraid.

BREAD!! I shouted when I entered the bakery. GIVE ME BREAD, NOWWWW. The other customers in the bakery quickly let me pass, impressed by my smell, my grizzly beard and my red rolling eyes. I got the bread for free, the lady behind the counter waved a string of garlic at me and started chanting secret spells (from World of Warcraft, I realize now).

I will spare you the awful details of my way home. I stayed alive by drinking the rain that poured down mercilessly and ... by eating the bread I had conquered with such an immense effort.

When I came home, after twenty-three days (I have to cry again ... sorry), my wife opened the door, shook my hand and said "Up you go Dalton, you smell like a rotten potato, please have a shower and I will prepare you some homemade bread with cheese and bacon". I fainted in the bathroom.

Hugs and Kisses,
Joey