Last night I had a wonderful and strange dream. I dreamed about meeting my wife for the first time … I felt so insecure and excited at the same time. Later she told me, that she fell in love with me within one hour, lucky guy that I am. Those were magic times, times for adventures and amazing things and I thank God for every day we share together. Let me try to explain what I felt dreaming, please close your eyes and listen to the music of one of my absolute favorite musicians, Isao Tomita:

Enjoy dreaming!
Kisses, Joey.

Dear Friends, the Dalton Family wishes you a Wonderful Christmas 2007.

My brothers and I will try to be better men in the coming years, looking for peace instead of fights.

We have intended to become like children again.

We hope that you may share these wonderful days with friends, family, neighbors and (yes) enemies; life is short and precious. I hope we will share our friendship for many years to come.

Kisses to all of you!
Joey.

Two days ago I visited a birthday party of neighbor Bob. The party was ... sustainable .. until the "main artist" appeared and started his performance in Bob's garden. The regrettable man tried to produce noises out of the stomach of a dead cow. All the guests were delighted but I think that the sound was disgusting; like someone tried to kill five cats at the same time.

During an "intermezzo" I studied the pipers instrument. There are five pipes. He puts one in his mouth .... were does he put the other ones ???? I really don't want to know and ...please, don't send me emails about this, I REALLY DON'T WANT TO KNOW.

I fled out-of the house into Bob's garden; I calmed down a bit and was thinking about this movie "Braveheart" where the British army (armed with UZI's, infrared guns, helicopters and neutron bombs ) was beaten by a Scottish one (armed with wooden sticks and ... piper-bags). At that moment I understood why ... and I also understood why Mel had such a difficult time after his role in this movie.

I am ok now, I am ok (valium can do a lot); you better stay away from these bad-pipers!

Hugs & Kisses,
Joey

Some of you (thanks, Elisa!) have asked me how my brothers are doing. Well ... OK ... I think. You know that Jack used to sleep a lot; did I tell you that his dear wife Cathrine has found a solution for this? Some far relative of hers has made a contraption that is tightly attached around the neck of Jack; whenever Jack sleeps, Cathrine pushes a red button on a remote control and a high electric pulse is sent directly to Jack's spine. The last time I have seen him, he looked extremely tired and bewildered.

  (did you see the red "heart" symbol ...)

I don't know how William is doing; the last sign I received from him was an SMS saying "I l-o-o-o-v-e Bungee Jumping! Have to go now, Bro; my turn again !". What the hack is "Bungee Jumping" ???

Averell. Well .... Averell, yes what shall I say ... My dear brother Av loves to cook and he is really a fabulous cook, but he has no talent for business. He recently found himself a partner (George Ramsay?) and has opened his own restaurant, called Aver-H-ell's Kitchen. I don't trust this Ramsay. Look what they ("he") put on the nearby highway bill-board:

Yes, very original and provocative, but still ...

Take care, be careful and watch over each other,
Kisses    , Joey

Dear Friends, for many, many years I had difficulties to fall asleep. I have experimented with many kinds of medicines, visited doctors, specialists, medicine men and gurus for a solution. Nothing or nobody solved my problem .... until I watched an episode of "Law and Order" on the TV.

Believe me, I love this series, that is also the reason that I completely forget my sleeping problem. Whenever I watch an episode of L&O, my body relaxes, my mind goes on standby and .... I fall asleep.

If you have the same problems as I had, please try for yourself.

Sleep well!
Joey.

"Hello Mister Dalton, yesterday, when I read your article about the cheap Christmas tree I was very enthusiastic. I like to go to the horse races, so you understand that I can use any spare dime.
Are you sure that all your instructions are correct? When I tried to do step-2, I was completely stuck; how to proceed further? My tree currently looks like this:

My living room is a little bit damaged by all my efforts with the the ax, the saw, the jack-hammer, the cement mill and the paint gun. I have worked so incredibly hard that I can hardly breath; my son, Tom-Tom is deadly tired too because of the awful noises I have made during the last 36 hours. My girl friend left my house ten hours ago, screaming like a squirrel and rolling with her eyes (better watch your steps!).

Help me, please! Any advice is more than welcome.
Tom."

Hello Tom, please send me your banking account number and I will send you some money to buy your family a normal Christmas Tree.

Regards, Joey

Dear Friends, Christmas holidays are coming rapidly and most people are making plans to buy a nice tree.
You know, the nicer the tree, the more expensive it is. Don't despair because today I will explain how you can create the most beautiful Christmas tree for less than TEN dollars. All your friends and neighbors will envy you.
Follow these steps closely but use your imagination if you see room for improvements:

Day One. Set you alarm clock at 2:00 AM, drive to a nearby park or forest and cut yourself a nice big tree. Take it home and go to sleep again. Be careful not to wake up the neighbors! This was the most difficult part.

Day Two. After breakfast get yourself a big bucket, make some space in your living room, place the bucket in the center and fill it with fast-drying cement. (If you don't mind standing half a day in your living room, holding a giant tree, you can use cheaper cement). Put the tree in the bucket (top up!).

When cement has hardened and the tree is tightly fixed in the bucket, clean up your room (don't use water to remove the cement spots!) and have a good night sleep.

Day Three. Today is the fun day. Decorate the tree with one or more of the following objects:

The finishing touch can be applied by draping all kind of toilet papers over the tree branches. White paper is OK but a little bit boring, Sudoku or sheet music toilet papers are really cool.

For the artists some additional tips; a nice tree crown can be made using these pointy orange/white things you sometimes find along bad highways (they go "Poink!" when you hit them). If you have a paint-gun, spray a nice color on parts of the tree;  do not exaggerate. Did you know that the filling of pillows makes wonderful fake snow ?

After Christmas holidays you maybe can eat some of the decorations (check carefully), saving yourself another meal. Good luck and enjoy !
Joey

Dear Friends, every week I receive one or two emails telling me that I can easily make a lot of money with a little effort. This effort is becoming less and less: it started with picking-up some people from the airport (carrying my money in big suitcases), followed by picking up the suitcases, sending an trustworthy address and, recently, giving my bank account so that the money can be funded straight away.

I am not a preacher but this all has to do with pure greed. Greedy people trying to fool other people and greedy people thinking to become rich for nothing. I only pity the innocent ones who become victims of this misery: elderly people, less smart people, mentally handicapped people, children maybe?

Be careful and, please, protect people in your neighborhood who are vulnerable.
Hugs and Kisses, Dear Friends, let us work together on a Better World!
Joey.

Dear Friends, today I celebrate that my dear friend Chiara passed her university exams. Chiara, you are wonderful, Lady!

Kisses, Joey.

Dear Friends, I was inspired by a comment of my dear friend Venus who said that "... These children reflect pure love ...". Venus is so right, what I see is the purest form of innocence and love. All my sorrows disappear when I look at their picture; no matter how bad I feel, when I look at these two children my heart melts and I have to smile. Allow me to post it again (and bless their parents!):

Look at these little angels and think about "racism", "axes of evil", "war", "power" and "making money" ...
If you don't get the message, I pity you, friend, I pity you ...

Joey.

Dear Friends, I feel so "little" today. I was wondering about my life so far, how I have lived, day after day, having both big and futile problems. But were all these problems really so important?  Sure? Every evening I ask myself the same question: "What did I do today to improve the world, to help other people and to learn from my experiences?".  Daily business seems so important, I know, but ... is it really so important when you consider that you are only here, on this small planet, this piece of rock circling around one of the trillion other stars in the known universe, for such a ridiculous short time? Why are you here? Who put you here? Who Are You?

I am sure, NOT to make money or to find yourself a very "powerful" position in human society, these are futile goals and utterly irrelevant. The truth can only be found in your hearth ... I think. Being honest to yourself is so important. Look at this picture and sincerely feel your feelings, the message is so obvious and so far away at the same time:

Hugs & Kisses,
Joey

Dear Friends, my last post about Sir Elton was not to ridicule him. I l--o--v--e his music, well ..., I like only his most famous song, I love the wise, well thought meaning of the lyrics, words that have been chosen by a master mind. Therefore, today, a tribute to Sir Elton with his number-1 top hit "Candles in the Wind", going like this:

Goodbye Norman James
Though I never knew you at all
You had the grace to hide yourself
While those around you sneaked
They crawled out of the dungeons
And they tapped you on your cheek
They set you on the railway
And they made you sing your song

And it seems to me you blew your life
Like a candle in the snow
Never knowing who to swing to
When the rain fell down, oh no (oh no !)
And I would have sworn to have known you
But I just had no clue
Your candle burned away my thick hair
Your family no-one knew

Loneliness was tough
The toughest man were you
Hollywood created a super-bowl
And 100 dollars was the price you paid
Even when you cried and yelled, so good
Oh the president still hounds you
All the waiters had to wait
Was that Marilyn who was lost in the wood?

Goodbye Norman James
From the young lad in the first row
Who sees you something deep in shames
More than just our naughty Monrow
I am going to drown myself in the Thames *** censored ***

(From the Album: "Time For My Medicines" / 2002 / Cool Lyrics)

If you want to Kara, OK, push the play button:

Enjoy!
Kisses, Joey.

Dear Friends, I received a phone call of a man called "Elton" who was very upset about my story about JJJ.
I will try to repeat what he said:

"Mister Dalton. Your story about JJJ was NOT FUNNY ! What is wrong with working in a circus? Do you think that Circus People cannot sing??? Hah !! I started my singing career in a circus many, many years ago.

At the top of my career I was allowed to sing as Main Attraction and people adored me, especially elderly English women and women-like men dressed in pink and wearing jolly glasses.

Yes, I was ambitious and tried to train myself to light candles in the wind (produced by a huge ventilator); fool that I was. During my first performance as Candle-Man, my hair got fire and Bilbo the Clown had to put my head in a bucket with water (I think it was water). The audience even applauded for this disaster and yelled "Bis ! Bis ! Bis!"

My hair is almost recovered now and I decided to go on as Circus Singer. What is wrong about that, Dalton???
Think man, before you blog something, think!.

Sir E.J., Royal Circus Singer"

This must be enough to give you a fresh start of the week, friends   
Kisses, Joey.